Goodbye, Berlin
2016
Fatih Akin
Euro Coming-of-Age Dramedy
What’s it all about: Anja Schneider is the kind of adorable MILF that guzzles vodka straight from the bottle and still aces every tennis match at her country club. Her son Tristan Göbel spends his summer stealing cars, crashing parties and fantasizing about revenge murder, so it’s a mixed message about the charms of alcoholic parenting.
First Encounter: first viewing
Prostitute Index: low
Death By: patricide
Relics: writing an essay on “What I Did Over Summer Vacation”
Hoops: high school outsiders who look like CK One models
Heartthrob: Aniya Wendel
Pass/Fails the Test of Time: passing notes
LoFi Magic: vomiting in homeroom
Makes me want to: cruise around in a big spacious Cadillac
Candotti Take: “Like, what this movie adds to your life?”
Worth a watch/rewatch: No
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