A Bigger Splash
2015
Lampedusa
Luca Guadagnino
Drama
What’s it all about: Ralph Fiennes takes us out of his comfort zone as a self-destructive music producer who won’t shut up and mansplains everything from love to the Rolling Stones. A muted Tilda Swinton is no help as Chrissy Hines-Bowie, recovering from vocal cord surgery.
First Encounter: first viewing
Prostitute Index: nil
Death By: being an a**hole
Relics: stadium concert, villagers who have nothing better to do than to watch a middle-aged man sing karaoke
Heartthrob: Tilda Swinton, Matthias Schoenaerts
LoFi Magic: snake tossing, Tilda’s all-purpose beach cover, lurching zoom-in camera moves on food and mechanics
Makes me want to: have a “Sea of Love” summer in the Mediterranean
Candotti take: The slap came too late in the movie. That girl she really deserved that slap. (Dakota Johnson)
Worth a watch/rewatch: No (watch “I am Love” instead)
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