Shotgun Wedding
2022
Indonesia
Jason Moore
Romcom Action Thriller
What’s it all about: Jennifer Lopez can’t decide if she’s a girlie girl who faints at the sight of blood, or her usual kick-ass self who drops grenades on pirates and lights bad guys’ faces on fire. Luckily, Jennifer Coolidge is on hand to keep this from feeling like a hostage situation.
First Encounter: first viewing
Prostitute Index: nil
Death By: helicopter fu @joebobbriggsofficial
Relics: a “something borrowed” cake knife
Hoops: J-Lo’s career-long obsession with proving she’s just Jenny from the block – name dropping Old Navy and shapewear, pigging out on camera, and casting Sônia Braga as her Brazilian mother to expand her dominance as alpha latina
Heartthrobs: J-Lo, Selena Tan
Pass/Fails the Test of Time: Lenny Kravitz
LoFi Magic: pirates with a sense of flair; hair extensions to the rescue
Words to live by: “Darcy! We’d come with you! But we don’t want to!”
Makes me want to: invite Jennifer Coolidge to my wedding (or just marry her)
Candotti Take: “Her dress never gets dirty. A plain Versace dress. / She seems to be more screaming than actually talking in the movie.”
Worth a watch/rewatch: Yes
#airplanemovie #jlo #jenniferlopez #lennykravitz #pornsafari #jennifercoolidge #soniabraga #cheechmarin #selenatan #darcycarden #calliehernandez #pirates #shotgunwedding #husbandotti #filmfest #unseenhorses